behavior that started right about the time I knew for certain that I was going to be out of work. It's becoming more and more frequent; anytime I sit down, there he is. If I leave the bedroom door open at night, I wake to find myself squished between Kitty and Puppy. It's very sweet, in a smothering sort of way.
I've had one phone interview so far, out of I don't know how many applications. I didn't get a callback for the group interview. It was for the edibles division of a medical marijuana company. I'm thinking that my lack of drug use counted against me. I have all the skills they needed, I just don't use pot. It triggers a nearly suicidal depression in me, so I don't use it. No 'just say no' anti-drug stuff going on, I just react badly so it's not the thing for me. That should have made me an attractive prospect and a natural for inventory control, but no. The interviewer told me that they'd winnowed over a hundred resumes down to about 40 'awesome' candidates. After a phone interview, about 16 or so would be invited to the group interview and from that about 10 people would be hired. It seems I was not awesome enough.
Bevin told me that the last time her company posted a job on Craigslist they got about 700 responses. That doesn't cheer me up. Unless her boss needs someone to go through resumes...
I couldn't do Bevin's job (she's a funeral director). After 7 years in hospice care and 7 years in an animal shelter I can't do any more caretaking emotional trauma type jobs. I just can't.
I don't know what I want to do next. Something that pays well enough, that's interesting enough to keep me motivated, something that doesn't suck up all my energy so that I have nothing left for the things I really enjoy. The things that make life worth living but don't provide a living wage.
It's gloomy and gray and chilly. I should take Puppy to the park, but I don't feel like going. If it were sunny, it would seem warm enough, but under a cloudy sky it just feels cold and damp. Bleh. We're in between sun and snow. Everything is in between right now, the weather, jobs, me... Everything is in flux, waiting for whatever comes next.